How to Be a Better Listener: “Listen without Agenda”
How often do you truly listen? According to a listening study, not as much as you think. Researchers found that only 50% of adults can accurately report what they have heard directly after a presentation, and the percentage drops to 25% after 48 hours. Most communication training programs focus on how to speak more clearly, confidently, and persuasively. But the other side of communication—the act of listening—can often be forgotten.
This is what led Andrew McMasters, actor, director, and leadership and communication consultant, to write “Listening Without Agenda.” His philosophy challenges conventional communication training practices that put speaking at the forefront.
He encourages listeners to absorb what’s being said without trying to solve problems, thinking of a response, or monitoring their body language. Listening is one of the cornerstones of meaningful communication. In this article, Andrew shares his tips and frameworks for becoming a better listener.
How to Become a Better Listener
As you listen, your brain is constantly jumping to conclusions based on what you think you know rather than what’s being said. Andrew explains, “your medial prefrontal cortex [the right side of the brain] is always aware–listening, watching, seeing, smelling. The dorsolateral prefrontal cortex [the left side of the brain] works on categorizing all this data from the right side against what we already know.”
Once you begin categorizing, you stop listening.
Unless you’re concentrating on listening, the categorizing part of your brain takes over and creates a narrative for you based on what you’re hearing–often a narrative that is different from what the other person is saying. Stay present by actively listening and resisting the urge to categorize or extrapolate meaning.
Listening vs. Solutioning
Another common listening issue is “solutioning” rather than listening. Do you catch yourself jumping in with advice the second someone shares a problem? In professional settings, where fixing things feels like the default mode, it can be hard to stop yourself from proposing a solution. But, offering solutions can leave the other person feeling unheard. Sometimes, people just need to know someone’s listening.
3 Active Listening Exercises
Unlearn Listening Reflexes
In his communication training programs, Andrew runs an exercise that disconnects the participants from their natural tendencies of focused listening–like nodding or saying “yes” or “okay.” This exercise makes the listener aware of what’s happening in their head as they’re listening.
For some people, cutting out the gestures that signal they’re listening frees them up to hear what the other person is saying. For others, like me, these gestures are second nature. When Andrew and I practised, I was too concentrated on staying immobile and silent that I couldn’t process what he was saying. Try this exercise yourself to see how you best listen to others, and if these gestures aren’t unconscious for you, cut them out.
Reflective Listening
Inspired by the work of psychologist Carl Rogers, who emphasizes disconnecting from the need to do something with the data we are given, reflective listening is the practice of reflecting back what you’ve heard. Andrew advises summarizing what you think you’ve heard and asking, “Is that correct?”
Practicing reflective listening removes ambiguity and makes sure everyone is on the same page before moving forward.
Listening on a Deeper Level
Andrew likens communication to an iceberg–90% is below water, and only 10% is above. The 90% ‘below the water’ of communication are the values, prejudices, and motivations of the person we’re listening to. This is a different practice that requires divining from the data you’re seeing and feeling to read between the lines of what the person is trying to communicate. It’s about noticing tone, body language, and even silences.
Staying Present as a Listener
Your body language not only affects how you’re seen but also how you listen. Nervous gestures or fidgeting can distract you from staying present. Andrew advises those who struggle with fidgeting to hold an object, like a pen, to stay grounded. Feel its texture or temperature to help anchor you in the moment and keep your attention focused on the conversation.
Listening without Agenda
By breaking free from the habit of categorizing, solutioning, or waiting for your turn to speak, you open the door to deeper, more meaningful interactions with listening at the center. Next time you’re having a conversation, why not try one of Andrew McMaster’s exercises? See what happens when you fully commit to hearing the other person.
As Andrew explores in his book “Listening Without an Agenda,” the power of listening goes far beyond words—it’s about understanding the unspoken. So, ask yourself: How much more could you understand if you truly listened?
